Adoption, adoptive parents, Parenting, Support Groups, waiting

Grief in the Adoption Process 

 When it comes to the adoption process, many uncertainties can arise during the process. Any family with plans to adopt should understand these things. Some of these uncertainties can cause grief, which can be defined as a natural response to loss that causes emotional suffering. We will cover some instances that may trigger grief in families waiting to be chosen by the birth parent(s).  


While waiting to be chosen by a family, these prospective adoptive parents must meet with social workers and share their background stories. This is to see how fit they are to parent and find the best options for them. This process may take a toll on some families with traumatic past experiences such as the loss of a child, inability to have a child, and even family financial issues that they have had to overcome. These are things that families must unpack to find an adoptee for them truly. Also, if they are not chosen, they must go through another mental toll that can lead to an excess of emotions such as grief.  

No Control of Situation 

Families who are waiting also have no control over the stages during the adoption process; in some cases, this may be too hard for some parents. These families have no idea how long they will be in the waiting poll to be able to adopt a child, so this by itself can build up anxious emotions. Furthermore, these uncertainties prohibit the families from being able to plan for a child they are waiting for because they do not know what will come about the situation in the end. In some cases, the birth parent will decide to parent, and this can cause grief to the family waiting because, in some way, they are experiencing the loss of a child that would have been theirs. Also, families may feel strongly rejected when they are not picked to adopt a child. 

All these factors, including many more, can cause a family to experience grief in the waiting process for a child. Seeking guidance and support if you or someone you know has had these experiences is essential, as it can aid the healing process. Grief is a strong feeling and can build up over time so dealing with this emotion sooner will be better, and it is vital to keep an open mind when entering the adoption process.  

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